Finding Yourself - 10.23.2020

I read a post recently that said something along the lines of: Stop saying you are finding yourself. You are you and have not been lost. Well, that was the gist of it. I have found myself contemplating that thought often. It seems to run as static in the back of my mind, making it's way to the front more often than it probably should. I don't agree, to be quite honest. I do, however, believe it could be true for some people. But, if you are like me, with so much time spent on the wrong person, with gigantic life changes happening for years, and the jumbled mess of being told, by basically everyone, how to think, behave, what to say when, etc.. etc.. I feel that yes, I was lost and had to find myself. With everything I have learned and lived over a decade and more, I have changed from who I used to be. But that's a good thing. We are supposed to change. We are supposed to grow. But then, who am I now? For the past five years I have made life an adventure. I force myself out of my comfort zone, meet people from around the world and learn how to at least say "hello" in their language. I listen to every type of music, fly to other parts of the world, find out everything that I may enjoy physically - because why not? How will I know if I don't try? These are my thoughts when I am writing. "What do I want to learn?" "Who do I want to be?" "What can I share?" I will tell you what I have learned so far; every experience is a good experience, even when it seems like it's not... just try not to linger.

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